My Blog

Kirsty writes regularly here

Good business relationships means growth

good business relationships means growth & success

Most business owners have learnt that even with the best products and business practices, it is the professional relationships you develop that will grow your business and lead to your success.  In this post I will share some tips on how to identify and build strong relationships that in turn will increase your success.

It is vital to form supportive relationships as your businesses grows. The way you interact and relate to others will have a direct positive or negative effect when it comes to your results and building the know, like, trust factor. As your business grows and responsibilities increase, your relationships and contact with customers, suppliers, competitors, industry leaders, financiers and professional mentors|advisers must also grow.

So how can you gain positive and supportive relationships within your business and encourage others to know you, like you and trust you? Here are my top four tips that has helped my business to continue to grow and expand, change and reinvent, each year since it began nearly two decades ago.

  1. Encourage Honest Feedback
    A good relationship needs clear and open communication channels of how everyone is performing. Encourage constructive criticism and be brave enough to hear what your clients, collegues and team members suggest are ways your business can perform better.
  2. Listen More Than You Talk
    Always clearly convey the strengths, features and benefits of your business so that you can impress potential clients and collaborators, and ultimately get more business – yet don’t forget to be a good listener. What will set you apart from your competitors is that you take the time to listen to your clients, team and colleagues more than you talk; and take time to really understand where they are coming from. Most people naturally want to be heard and tell their story. Being known as a good listener is the kind of behavior that leads to referrals and long-term business success.
  3. Make A Routine
    Create a system to ensure that not too much time passes before you connect with your contacts, such as a formal database or spread sheet. With the explosion of social media tools it’s never been easier to keep in touch, so include this in your follow up strategy. Most of your contacts are people you don’t know well but who may become clients or collaborators in the future. It is worthwhile regularly connecting with them so that you keep top of their mind and you never know who they will bump into that needs your services even if they don’t.       If you’ve spoken briefly to someone at a conference or a networking event have a follow up routine in place.
  4. Be Trustworthy And Build Trusting Relationships
    So a person or group now know you, they like you and the last, and possibly most important thing to do, is to build trust. Relationships built on trust are the most personal, valuable and often the longest-lasting ones. Trust is built on a foundation of honesty, genuineness and a feeling of rapport and synergy. You may have frequently worked together or you have had many interactions with one another that has gone well. The most profitable business deals are the ones that are made through trusted, and often long term, relationships.

How can you build great business relationships? How can you be more consistent in showing up, being seen, and getting to know others on a deeper level? Networking, meeting for coffee, chatting on the phone and email contact all take time that is unbillable hours – yet after a while the return on your time investment will be well worth it.

Kirsty 🙂

 

Posted in: Business

Leave a Comment (0) →

Looking after yourself – Guilt free!

Looking after yourself

“I don’t have enough time to look after myself, and anyway, it is selfish to take time out for me when I have a family to look after – isn’t it?” A statement I hear often from many of my clients and friends. There was a time I even said this.

I realised a long time ago through my own parenting experience, my business and the many parents I come across, there is one major factor that gets overlooked – if you are not okay, how can anything else be okay. If you are feeling run down, overwhelmed or undervalued why not try something new? I am going to share with you how you can get out of the old belief systems of selflessness and move into looking after self – being self -full.

What does self-full mean? A few years ago I watched a You Tube video that featured Iyanla Vanzant, who is a best-selling author. The question was asked, “Is your cup full?” She spoke about putting yourself first and being strong in life. She said that doing this is not selfish it is self-full. Iyanla said, “It’s self- full to be first, to be as good as possible to you. To take care of you, keep you whole and healthy. That doesn’t mean you disregard everything and everyone. But you want to come with your cup full. You know: My cup runneth over. What comes out of the cup is for y’all. What’s in the cup is mine. But I’ve got to keep my cup full.” Hearing this was a light bulb moment for me – it changed the way I parented, gave to others, and especially how I looked after me.

From my years of experience personally and professionally, I have found that if you are not okay, nothing else will be, no matter what skill you adopt or distraction you create. The relationship you have with yourself will determine how you think and feel, how you deal with challenges, as well as the relationship you have with everyone else in your life. Your level of self-esteem and the value you put on yourself will determine your performance and productivity. This is the first area to renew and polish up to fill your cup.

I like to use the metaphor of vehicles, as I believe life is a journey and people generally feel the silent and invisible push to move forward in their lives. Let’s look at the family car. Most people feel a responsibility to keep their car in good condition, up to a safe standard, using the right fuel and properly serviced so that they, and their family, can get from A – B in comfort and safety. The car expenses and upkeep are put in the budget and scheduled, because this is important to have this asset in top condition.

You can view yourself as important as your mode of transport. You are in charge of getting you and your family safely from A – B (mentally, emotionally and physically). To do this you need to be in good condition, getting the right fuel and services. You need to view yourself as an asset to the family unit and most importantly have resources of time and energy to move yourself and family forward.

I will share with you my top nine ways I keep in top condition, and enjoy the ride.

  1. Every morning before I get out of bed, I affirm myself and my family, I see my daily plan play out in my mind the way I would like it to go, make any adjustments, take a deep breath and get out of bed to start my day.
  2. I communicate regularly with my family and friends on what is going on for me, and ask for support when I need it.
  3. I make sure I am properly fuelled! I drink enough water, I eat healthy food and I exercise in a way that is right for me. I find yoga and meditation keeps me mentally, emotionally and physically strong.
  4. I have regular activities and interests that are just for me. I pamper myself quarterly. I benefit so much from acupuncture and massage treatments that help with tension build up and tightness.
  5. I catch up with friends regularly who inspire me, make me laugh, support me and align with my life values.
  6. I make learning a priority. I find keeping my mind active and expanding, either through formal or informal education, keeps me happier, healthier and feeling more resourceful when challenges show up. I love the saying by Charlie Tremendous Jones – “You will be the same person in five years time that you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.”
  7. I have learnt I don’t have to be Super Mum – I instead get Super Support! Whether it is paid help, help from friends or within the community – I think about the best thing I can do to leverage my time or support myself and my children through certain issues, and then I ask.
  8. I am constantly checking in with myself, and asking, “what is the best use of my time right now.”
  9. I take time each week to celebrate my achievements, discoveries, my trials and my ability to overcome them. I acknowledge that through my mistakes I get closer to getting it right. I appreciate the lessons from life and my family. By doing this I can readjust and move forward easier.

Many years ago, while I was watching TV feeding one of my babies, I heard a celebrity who was being interviewed say that what he remembered and treasured most about his mother, and what he believed contributed to his massive success, wasn’t how much she loved him; it was how much she loved life. This simple statement struck a cord in me at the time. So much so, that since then I have strived to live my life in a way that shows abundance, resourcefulness and moments filled with joy and laughter – and that I am here to get the most out of each and every moment. In doing this, I have seen that it has passed on certain attitudes and beliefs to my children, family and friends.

My sincere wish is that your cup is always full, you can love life, and you can make looking after you a guilt free priority.

Kirsty 🙂

Posted in: Parenting, Resilience

Leave a Comment (0) →

Achieve Your Goals

Vacation on an islandMost people feel after setting goals an enthusiasm and new lease on life. They are on purpose; they know their why, and know what is important. At this point, I like to remind everyone that with change can come obstacles.

Many have been stumbling down their current path for years, and then a whole new direction is decided. Many areas of their lives will now undergo change—from health habits, social relationships, work/career, and even routines.

Here are my top four tips to stay on track –

  1. A comfort zone is just a known zone in your mind—a set way of thinking, seeing and doing things. You will have to get out of it if you want new stuff. Einstein said, “The definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” It takes about 28 days to form a new habit and be rid of an old one. Commit to a new behaviour and actions that support your goals for just 28 days. Then do it again for the next 28 days.
  2. Get rid of the obstacles and mental clutter by asking, “what can I stop, minimise, keep doing, do more of, and start, to make my life flow?” The quality of your life is the quality of questions you ask.
  3. Be kind to yourself and be flexible. Some days are better than others are. If you have a bad one, don’t get mad, just decide to be better the next day and improve. Psychologists are finding that self-compassion may be the most important life skill—it fosters resilience, courage, energy, and creativity. The little things you do on a daily basis create change in your life.
  4. Trust and invest in you. You are going to be so excited and focused on your goals and will notice opportunities turn up to meet every step. I always trust it when I get a hunch to ring someone, follow up on something, or start an activity. I advise people to invest their time and energy, ?and money in themselves—their education, their health, things that make them feel good—and it is amazing how much easier life, and goal achievement gets for them.

Conquer fear, limited thinking, outdated habits, and negative inner dialogue and the rest is easy. I encourage you to continually improve, continually reinvent, listen to your inner ideas and inspirational thoughts, serve others, and persist.

Kirsty 🙂

Posted in: Business, Resilience

Leave a Comment (0) →

3 D’s – Do, Delegate, Dump

Do

I can get very busy distracting myself from the daily grind of life pressures. With no one here to see what I am doing, as my office is at home and my husband works away, I can get caught up in meaningless tasks that do not contribute to any level of achievement or feelings of satisfaction. I often remind myself that how I am using my time compared to how I could be using my time is completely different.

Social media is a classic example of time slipping away unchecked—where magically 10 minutes turns into 2 hours and during this time the tasks on the to do list did not magically get done.

To overcome the distractions I follow the 3 D’s. They are –

Do—The tasks you must do or want to do yourself.

Once you have identified these –

  • Prioritise tasks in order of importance and urgency.
  • Group similar tasks together, for example all phone calls, appointments, housework, play time, you time etc.
  • Make the best of your prime time—the time when you have the most energy during the day and the least interruptions.

Delegate—Get someone else to do some tasks.

I am living the FIFO (fly in fly out) life, if my husband was home I would ask him to do certain tasks, or they would be his job. He is not here some of the time so I will ask my daughter, her boyfriend and close friends to help. Tasks that can wait till my husband gets home go on his list that I have on the fridge awaiting his return.

To delegate chosen tasks is helping others as well as yourself. I encourage my family to think as part of a team, and when one team member can’t, the others step up. In the beginning I found it hard to let go of tasks, for many reasons including being judged as not coping and the fear of not being noticed as a super, important and busy person. I had to look at it another way—I had extra time for other things I wanted to do and I had shared an opportunity for someone to learn something new that they could be appreciated for it.

Dump—If it is of no value, get rid of it.

Be aware throughout the day of the time eaters. Decide if what you are doing is taking you closer to your goals. The time eaters are the activities that take you off track or are not contributing to feeling happy, healthy, and productive. Good examples are—

  • Social media pages and games,
  • Those wonderful warm, funny and fuzzy emails that are sent to you,
  • Too much TV,
  • Annoying and draining people, or worry. ?If it is not on the to-do list—worry is rarely on a to-do list— dump it. If family time or exercise time is lost due to being in front of a screen—turn it off.

Your turn – What can you be doing, delegating and dumping to be more productive?

Write down three things you can start to do differently from today and watch your stress reduce and results increase.

Kirsty 🙂

Posted in: Resilience

Leave a Comment (0) →

Book Review – Mindfulness on the Run

9781925335033-copy25%

Mindfulness on the Run – Dr Chantal Hofstee

The power of mindfulness is something I have lived, learnt and taught over the past two decades – so when the opportunity presented itself from Exisle Publishing to review this book I jumped at the chance. My first thought was, “what a brilliant title, promising to allow even more people to feel the benefits of living a mindful life.”

I opened the book and by page 10 I was hooked. The way Dr Hofstee relates key topics like understanding your brain, processing emotions, changing stressful thoughts, the mind-body connection and overcoming blocks is outstanding.

As the pages flowed and an understanding and practice was established for your own life, she then moved onto showing how you could expand into Mindful communication, relationships and conflict resolution.

Each chapter is supported by very real examples and exercises that are explained simply to encourage the reader to practice immediately. My personal favourites were the on-the-run tips. As the book progressed learning’s flowed from previous section and expanded into the next.

I will definitely be recommending this well written and researched practical handbook to others who are seeking a resource that is easy to read, informative and supports their busy lifestyles.

Kirsty 🙂

Posted in: Mindfulness

Leave a Comment (0) →

Get Organised – Plans to be on Purpose

office-620817_1920

Everyone needs times dedicated to pausing and updating their life and family plan. There is truth in the saying, “For every minute spent organising, an hour is earned.” Instead of being on fast-forward, rewind, or even continuous play—stop, plan, and get organised.

At this point, I have seen many run to the hills of disorganisation, the land of the known and familiar. Instead of planning and implementing, they procrastinate. I challenge you to eat the elephant beetle—which means conquering the hardest and least desirable task first—so you can forever overcome disharmony and overwhelm.

There are countless time management and organisational resources out there—books, blogs, experts, and online forms. Some will work and some won’t. To get you started here are some of my suggested organisation and routine activities. My biggest piece of advice though—as time never changes, yet what can change are the choices made in the time available, always practise choice management, rather than time management.

Have a weekly plan, which creates a flexible routine.

A routine provides the freedom to focus on what is being done in the moment, knowing that all the activities to be accomplished will be done efficiently and effectively—the right things, in the right order. Many stumble whilst doing the right things in the wrong order. Meaningful routines create a happier, calmer, and less stressful environment.

Without a plan or routine days turn into weeks, and the weeks turn into months it all becomes a blur – the purpose of it all can be drowned out by the constant demands. Many times, I have viewed my days as a stream of things to do and busy-ness.

Activity

Take a moment now and reflect on your past week. Each week should contain all or some of the following activities and tasks. Did yours?

  • You time—reading, relaxing, entertainment, rest, hobby, fun, gardening, meditating, journaling, and time to generate new ideas.
  • Body time—Exercise, Yoga, massage, sport.
  • Connecting with others—Family, friends, sport, volunteer or community involvement.
  • Parenting duties—School drop offs and pick-ups, sporting events, tutoring, general running around, homework, fun time together, connecting and being present with your child/ren.
  • Home duties—cleaning, maintaining, general upkeep of house, groceries, finances, ironing, cooking.
  • Study—Assignments, credentialing, recognition from a regulatory body, seminars, researching, continual learning.
  • Work—Employed position.
  • Work—Own business. Delivering the product/ service that is core to your role, admin, course/product development, finances, networking, and professional collaboration.

I would like to point out that you time is at the top of this list. You time is commonly the first thing to go or be down graded to an activity of least importance. If this is happening for you or a member of your family, take time to re-prioritise. Without looking after you first, any routine is difficult to maintain and run-down people get sick.

An example of my weekly planner (which is pictured below) is printed on a sheet of paper I have on my pin-board. I like choosing a different colour for each area, as indicated in the picture, as this has more impact visually for me. In each coloured section I also have written what particular activity it is that I plan to do in that time.

Time Choice Management Schedule

This is a valuable tool for me and has been used by many of my clients. You may like to make your own, change colours, times, or activities. What matters is that this gives you a chance to view your whole week, what you do and how you can do it better.

Have a list.

I love a good list. I have an overall to-do list, a daily to-do list, a grocery list, a work list, a home list, list for gifts, and the list goes on! From watching me make lists over the years my children now have the list-making bug. My youngest son has lists of movies he wants to see, a list for Santa (usually started in April), and a list of jobs to do. My daughter makes lists for presents (she is a gift- giver by nature), a shopping list, which she calls a budget, and a dream list.

A question that I ask myself at numerous times during the day is, “What is the best use of my time right now?” This question is an opportunity to look at my list and see what I could be doing in the time I have right now and the energy I have available to me. Without my lists, I can very easily be distracted and taken off task.

Lists and weekly planning are the most effective way to improve overall performance, both personally and professionally. Wasted time is irreplaceable.

Stick with it to create a habit.

Daily disciplines create the changes in our lives. It takes about 28 days to create new habits. At about week two resistance, distraction, and lack of focus raise their unhelpful heads. This is the testing time. This is the time to push that bit harder, knowing why it is important to be organised and on purpose. Seek and gain support and take one day at a time. You can do it!

K x

 

Posted in: Resilience

Leave a Comment (0) →

Collaborating to Help Others Thrive

DSC_2218I recently had the amazing pleasure of working together with Sophee of Sophee Smiles to create a blog to support couples in any type of long distance relationship – whether married to an adventurous jet-setter like Sophee, in love with a FIFO worker like me, struggling with your partner’s deployments, living in a different city to your loved one, travelling regularly yourself or anything in between, this blog post is filled with guidance, support, tips and understanding.

I adore collaborating, and my business has grown dramatically over the years due to these partnerships.  Whether it be recommendations, working together on projects, getting help, linking people together or sourcing experts to contribute to my publications and referral lists – collaborating is an essential for all business people.  It is also a must for volunteers, friends, people who are separated by work, and within the community – how else can a joint effort and better results be realised?

Charlie ‘Tremendous’ Jones said, “You will be the same person in five years time as you are now, if not for the books you read and the people you meet.” I am certainly blessed to meet and work with many amazing people, which in turn allows me to have more, be more and do more.

So I encourage you to embrace collaborative partnerships and create new opportunities for yourself and others this week.  What have you got to loose? What could you have to gain?

Here are some tips to help keep your long-distance relationship happy and healthy, by Sophee and me.

Kirsty 🙂

Posted in: Business

Leave a Comment (0) →

Feel Better and Have More Energy – It Begins With a Good Nights Sleep.

I am a FIFO wife, which means that my husband works away – fly in, fly out. His current roster is six weeks away and two weeks home. What has this got to do with a blog on sleeping you may ask?

Yesterday he flew back to the site where he works, and I slept right through and woke up this morning feeling refreshed. After I bumped into a friend at school drop off and she commented on how ‘sparkly’ I was looking today I knew that a good nights sleep would be the topic of my blog today.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I love having my husband home. Yet over the eight years we have been separated by work, I have noticed the difference a good nights sleep versus a broken nights sleep can make on how I function during the day.

During the two weeks he is home there are nights where I do not get a restful and peaceful nights sleep. This is mainly because I am not used to extra body warmth, snoring, sleeping noises, and I have my mothers’ ears on at night (you know, that part of your brain that never quite shuts off when you are a Mum and jumps to attention at any uncommon sounds). After one of these nights I often wake up cranky, depleted, flat, exhausted, and my brain seems to take longer to get with the program of the day.

Stressful times, change, jet lag, babies, menopause, illness, or the like, will also have you waking up during the night more frequently and have you staring at the clock at midnight or 2am wishing for sleep.

At this point I would advise to turn the clock away from you in the bedroom because staring at the clock when you can’t sleep actually increases the stress hormone known as cortisol in your body, making it more difficult to fall asleep.

Professor David Hillman, Chair of the Sleep Health Foundation, says that approx. 25% of Australians complain of difficulty with sleep. He also says that around half of those, (1 in 10 people), have a disorder of sleep that may need medical attention. The remainder suffers from poor sleep habits, including failure to make enough time for sleep in their busy lives.

Without taking time out to rest, recover and have adequate sleep judgment, mood, and the ability to learn and retain information are weakened. Your health, mentally and physically is impacted. People who have poor sleeping habits are less productive, anxious, less safe when driving and suffer more mood swings – compared to those that have good sleeping habits live longer and have stronger immune systems; and possibly those that live with them live longer and are less stressed too!

There are good reasons why lack of quality sleep affects you so adversely. Sleep allows your mind and body to recover from the day’s events, stresses and wear and tear. When we sleep the body goes through six processes that include:

  1. Toxic waste management
  2. Healing/Repair/Immune
  3. Growth
  4. Anti stress and emotional consolidation
  5. Memory consolidation
  6. Learning

There are many things you can do to get a better nights sleep. Begin by making proper rest, recovery time and sleep a priority for you and your family.

My husband and I know that we only have a short time together and we don’t want it interrupted by the result of being tired or run down. We want to make the most of our time together, and apart, so we have developed good habits for quality rest and sleep. We are mindful to avoid stimulants like caffeine and alcohol for at least an hour before bed and finish eating at least two hours before sleep time. We make sure, overall, what we eat in the evening is easily digested and isn’t high in sugar as to support a calmer ‘rest-ready’ body. We keep a consistent sleep routine where possible and create a home and bedroom environment (including a comfortable bed) that promotes relaxation.

There is no right amount of sleep hours or a perfect wind down routine – the trick is to work out what is right for you that has you feeling refreshed, mentally sharp and productive each day.

What can you change to feel better, have more energy and enjoy a good nights sleep?

Sweet dreams all, Kirsty 🙂

 

Posted in: Mindfulness, Resilience

Leave a Comment (0) →

Is Your Cup Full? Boosting Mental Health for FIFO Families

www.unitywords.com.au

Excerpt from Separated by Work – Kirsty O’Callaghan – Chapter 5

…Some people still think that it’s shameful if they have a mental illness, are experiencing a loss of control emotionally or irrational and dark thinking. There are those that assume it shows personal weakness or a failing. If it’s children who have a mental illness, some conclude it reflects the failings of the parents. Stigma and discrimination are the two biggest obstacles to a productive solution-based conversation about mental health in a FIFO environment and at home.

I have had more people thank me than judge me because I have been so open about my stuff. I have had more people begin to cope again and even love life again, because I and others like me, have shared our stuff and not hidden it behind the idea of right and wrong.

Mental health and suicide are becoming more recognised and discussed within FIFO communities and on-site camps. There is still some intolerance and small mindedness, there always will be those people who cannot get out of their own way, but acceptance is growing.

One of the programs from an Australian site included as part of their orientation something called the 4C’s. The third C was Caring and the fourth C was Courageous.

  • It stated in the part for caring—“I am accountable for my actions and actively care for the safety of myself and others—Care about the welfare of my neighbours in the camp—the FIFO lifestyle comes at a cost to all of us and our families. Please keep an eye on your workmates and if someone is acting out of character, or saying things like I don’t see the point anymore, or there is no hope, please reach out to them and discreetly ask them if they’re okay, and if they’re not, help them get in contact with professional resources.”
  • Courage included the actions of—“I will speak up, provide positive feedback to my peers, and prevent incidents by utilising stop work authority and coaching. This also includes the courage to reach out to a work mate and ask them if they’re ok.”

If you find yourself in the gut wrenching or numb place of despair and your cup is empty, approach your mates, your family and even have a chat to a professional. Everyone at some time is running on empty and it takes courage to ask for help, to make the changes you need to make it to the next day. Keep your cup full and keep filling the cups of those you care about.

From my years of experience personally and professionally, I have found that if you are not okay, nothing else will be, no matter what skill you adopt or distraction you create. The relationship you have with yourself will determine how you think and feel, how you deal with challenges, as well as the relationship you have with everyone else in your life. Your level of self-esteem and the value you put on yourself will determine your performance and productivity. This is the first area to renew and polish up to fill your cup.

Activity

Just check in right now. Firstly, take a long slow deep breath. Feel the breath go in through your nose, travel down your throat, fill your lungs, and expand in your belly. Let it sit there for just a moment then exhale, blowing all the air out and as you do feeling a sense of release and calm. Do this a couple more times. Slow and controlled, and with an awareness of how you are already much more relaxed.

Now that you are more calm and centred, ask a few self check-in questions—

  • How are you feeling?
  • How much do you like yourself?
  • How much do you understand yourself?
  • What are you good at? What do you love doing?
  • What are your favourite things?
  • Do you reward yourself?
  • What do you dislike?
  • Are you a friend to you, or are you your own enemy?
  • Close your eyes and imagine you can see your cup, is it full, empty or half way?
  • Are you aware of your thoughts and the way you think most of the time? What about now?

Take a few minutes to make some notes on your thoughts and findings.

Your mind and thinking can be your friend or your own worst enemy. I read an article recently where William James, an American philosopher and psychologist, said, “The greatest weapon we have against stress is to choose one thought over another.” This sounds easy, yet let me make it clear right up front. It takes time, patience, and persistence to do this effectively.

Your mind has had free reign for so long it has developed its own way of viewing the world. When you start taking notice, you are going to find thoughts that create feelings that create beliefs that are either outdated or downright stupid. Some thoughts and beliefs that used to fit in your life when you were working 9—5 and coming home every evening, are not going to fit during a FIFO roster…

Kirsty 🙂

Get your copy of Separated by WorkHERE

Posted in: Mindfulness, Resilience, Separated by Work

Leave a Comment (0) →

Making Mothers Day Special – Even When Separated By Work

Life doesn't comewith a manual,it comes with a Mother-3How Fly-In-Fly-Out workers can make Mother’s Day special for their Mum or partners from afar.

Kirsty shares her tips on how your Mum or partner can still feel spoilt, valued and special even if you are away for Mothers Day.

When she was interviewing people to share their stories in her book, she came across a particularly thoughtful FIFO worker –

“My closest friend, Gail, works with a lady whose partner works two weeks away and one week home. During one of his swings away, her daughter became ill and was hospitalised for a few days. One morning after a very stressful week, she was talking to her partner on Skype and he asked if there was anything he could do, anything at all. She jokingly said you could cook dinner tonight. They both laughed. That night after she got home from work, there was a knock at the door at 6 p.m. She walked to the door wondering who would be there at that time of the evening. She opened the door, and to her surprise, there stood the Domino’s pizza delivery boy with dinner – organised by her partner. When I heard this story, it bought a tear to my eye. It shows how we can all think outside of the box, listen to our partner’s needs and not be limited by FIFO.”

Excerpt From: “SEPARATED BY WORK.”

Take a moment to think about what your partner or Mum really likes. What is happening when you notice that they are feeling the most loved and appreciated? Is it flowers, is it things done for them, is it thoughtful gifts, is it giving freely of your time and attention, or is it just taking time to affirm how grateful you are for all they do? When you work that out you will be recognised and talked about as the best partner, son or daughter, because you took the time to acknowledge them in a way that was most meaningful to them.

Top tips on giving from afar –

  • Make it meaningful to your partner.
  • Remember that this is all about them.
  • Be original and thoughtful.
  • Be prepared – don’t leave it till the last minute.
  • Do a couple of different things, for example – call or Skype in the morning whilst you are holding a plate of eggs on toast and a flower as if you were serving her breakfast, have a gift arriving pre-organised with a friend, and get dinner delivered, or have a special container pre-frozen in the freezer that you cooked that wasn’t to be touched until Mother’s day evening.

“Love is not limited by distance or miles – Love is enhanced by connection and smiles.” – Kirsty O’Callaghan

 

 

Posted in: Parenting, Separated by Work

Leave a Comment (0) →
Page 1 of 7 12345...»